Tuesday, June 16, 2009


"Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why yes, I do know you. Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The Judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots ask her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'"

******Note to all attorneys...GOOD ADVICE!! LOL!
(This was sent to me by my good friend, Brandy Knight).


Knight said...

Hey Deb, I am following now, sorry though I really thought I already was following you.

I like Grandma, she's a real lady, don't mind telling it like she sees it. I am glad to see you posted granny, along with her good advice for all attorney's and judges (we know how they really act outside court).


Deb Murphree/Alabama Politics said...

Hey Girl...glad to hear from you. Went past your residence today, and thought of you. (stockyard day, ya know lol)...I'm sending you private email for other info. Thanks again for the Grandma goes to court joke. I LOVE it...and I have had others tell me so as well! :) Oh, and yes, you are right. We both DO know how attorneys and judges act outside of court...as well as INSIDE ...ugh.